All I Want for Christmas Is a Cowboy by Jessica Clare

Author:Jessica Clare
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Penguin Publishing Group
Published: 2018-11-05T16:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Eli remained inside the barn for a while. It wasn’t that working on the saddles was so very pressing. It was that he wanted time to sort through his thoughts. Much easier to do it with something to occupy his hands and let his thoughts work through everything that was going on. It helped that Cass was safely tucked away in the house, because when she was near him, he found it too distracting to do much other than gaze at her like some starry-eyed fool.

Couldn’t help it, though. He wanted her like he’d never wanted anyone before in his life.

He rubbed oil into the last saddle for the night, thinking hard. They shouldn’t have kissed. He knew that. Likely she knew that, too. It was a bad kind of situation and bad timing. She was still recovering from her knock on the head. She didn’t have her memories. She was beholden to him at the ranch because she was trapped here. It shouldn’t have happened, but it seemed like they couldn’t stay apart from each other. He hadn’t meant to give her that first angry kiss. Instead of slapping him, she’d grabbed him by the collar and kissed him back so fiercely that it shocked him.

It also aroused him. There was something so fascinating about Cass. She was sweet and wanted so much to be helpful, even if she was terrible at it. She was a constant optimist, and she loved simple things—the dogs, music, the holidays. But she also had a fiercely determined side, and he’d seen that when she’d snagged his collar and hauled him forward to plant her mouth on his.

She didn’t like taking no for an answer.

Eli liked that a lot.

He knew she didn’t have her memories. He was all too aware of that. She seemed to recall lots of bits and pieces about who she was as a person and her past, but when she tried to think about her current situation, it was a blank. He knew it was wrong to get involved with her, especially when she was in a situation like this. It was a bad idea.

But he was starting not to care.

If she liked him, and he liked her, and they took things slow . . . did it matter if she didn’t have all her memories? As long as he was respectful of her and her boundaries, did he care if she didn’t recall what her job was or where she lived?

More than that, was it wrong for him to fantasize that she’d never get those memories back? Eli knew it was. He knew that she hated the missing parts of her mind, and he knew that she was desperate to get those pieces back. What happened when she did, though? Would she immediately pack up and leave? Would he never hear from her again once she realized just who she was? The thought was like a punch in the gut.

So yeah, sometimes he dreamed that she wouldn’t get those parts of her back.

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